Sten Taracks: How I Learned To Start Loving Donald Trump
Until recently I was very anti-Donald Trump. I thought his candidacy would vacuum all seriousness out of the Republican Party, doom it to general election failure if he won the nomination, and usher in terrible policies if, God forbid, he won the White House.
No other belief was truly intelligent. Fearing Trump and praying for his eventual and timely demise was what I had to do.
However, after taking a leisurely stroll on a gorgeous early autumn evening, I put all those irrationally reasonable fears to rest. Truth be told, “The Donald” wouldn’t be too bad. In fact he wouldn’t be bad at all: He would be the most excellent President in the history of the United States!
Where did I find this comfort? It was a magical epiphany, an ability to finally grasp everything a passionate, under-informed slice of America is thinking. And, to put it simply, people are tired of thinking too much. There you have it. Why go beyond putting it simply? Then I’d be thinking too much, and you’d stop reading this if you haven’t stopped already.
We need Trump as GOP nominee and eventual U.S. President for precisely that reason. He sounds like he knows what he’s talking about, while real politicians talk over our heads all the time.
[mks_pullquote align=”right” width=”300″ size=”24″ bg_color=”#ffffff” txt_color=”#000000″]“Winging it” has lost so much respect in modern day America.[/mks_pullquote]
Consider Trump’s marvelous position on health care. He plans to replace Obama Care with “something terrific,” which is exactly what we need. Our current President said his mega-law would be terrific, too, but so far that hasn’t been the case. Meanwhile other politicians are offering their own health care ideas, giving us various reasons to think their plans are even more terrific.
Don’t they realize all these darn details are bogging us down? What America ought to do is pass laws to find out what’s in them, and better yet, elect politicians to learn what they’re going to do. Yes, that’s the nature of elections anyway, but we ought to go all-in and just wing it completely. “Something terrific” sounds good enough to me. All we have to do to make America great again is replace everything with terrific stuff!
Further solidifying my support for Trump is his stance on the Iran “deal.” I’m absolutely sure he could negotiate a much better agreement than Obama, maybe even offering the Supreme Leader a complimentary Trump Tower suite to grease the skids.
Heck, build a fancy Tehran casino if Iran surrenders completely! Even in a no-gambling society, centrifuge-themed roulette wheels might become quite popular. Wager it all on double-plutonium for explosive winnings! The Casino could also offer special late-night Ramadan deals at its buffet, which would help Iranians embrace Western gluttony in no time. And then what would we have to fear?
In short, there’s simply too much additional talking point fluff and speculation about Trump to list here. He’s brave enough to just wing it with our country’s future, and if we Americans want to prove we can become brave and great again, then we must do the same with our ballots.
“Winging it” has lost so much respect in modern day America.
There have been a few instances in my employment history when I was brave enough to throw all caution into the wind, do things my own way and disregard all established practices, knowledge and customs. You know what happened in those jobs? I was fired, a blatant sign of my bosses being unfair!
However I can now rest assured because Donald Trump is on the way. He’ll put America back on the right track, simply because he believes he’s the best person for the job! Put him in the Oval Office, fellow Americans, and he’ll carve his name into the history books . . . and Mount Rushmore . . . and Mount McKinley.
Precisely the non-plan we need!
/sarcasm
