Say Anything: Reader Blogs

Comparing Bill Clinton’s “My Life” Book to the book Titanic

sanity — 2009-06-21T07:50:08+00:00

Received by a friend of mine via email from NY, I felt the need / want to share.

Don’t care who you are…this is FUNNY!
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Students at a Pocono school were assigned to read 1 of 2 books, either ‘Titanic’ or ‘My Life’ by Bill Clinton.

One student turned in the following book report, he said that they were nearly identical stories!

His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report.
Here’s his comparison:

Titanic:.... cost - $29.99
Clinton :.... cost - $29.99

Titanic:..... Over 3 hours to read
Clinton :.... Over 3 hours to read

Titanic:..... The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.
Clinton :....The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

Titanic:..... Jack is a starving artist.
Clinton :.... Bill is a bullshit artist

Titanic:.... In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
Clinton :... Ditto for Bill.

Titanic:..... During the ordeal, Rose’s dress gets ruined.
Clinton :.... Ditto for Monica.

Titanic:..... Jack teaches Rose to spit.
Clinton :.... Let’s not go there.

Titanic:.... Rose gets to keep her jewels
Clinton :... Monica is forced to return her gifts.

Titanic:..... Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
Clinton :... Clinton doesn’t remember Jack.

Titanic:..... Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
Clinton :.... Monica…ooh, let’s not go there, either.

Titanic:..... Jack surrenders to an icy death.
Clinton :... Bill goes home to Hillary - basically the same thing.

A Letter to Our Government Politicians

sanity — 2009-06-21T07:29:19+00:00

I received this by email not long ago, and I thought I would share. Take the time and read it.

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Glenn Beck read this on his radio show….
GLENN: I got a letter from a man in Arizona. He writes an open letter to our nation’s leadership:

I’m a home grown American citizen, 53, registered Democrat all my life. Before the last presidential election I registered as a Republican because I no longer felt the Democratic Party represents my views or works to pursue issues important to me. Now I no longer feel the Republican Party represents my views or works to pursue issues important to me. The fact is I no longer feel any political party or representative in Washington represents my views or works to pursue the issues important to me. There must be someone. Please tell me who you are. Please stand up and tell me that you are there and that you’re willing to fight for our Constitution as it was written. Please stand up now. You might ask yourself what my views and issues are that I would horribly feel so disenfranchised by both major political parties. What kind of nut job am I? Will you please tell me?

Well, these are briefly my views and issues for which I seek representation:

One, illegal immigration. I want you to stop coddling illegal immigrants and secure our borders. Close the underground tunnels. Stop the violence and the trafficking in drugs and people. No amnesty, not again. Been there, done that, no resolution. P.S., I’m not a racist. This isn’t to be confused with legal immigration.

Two, the TARP bill, I want it repealed and I want no further funding supplied to it. We told you no, but you did it anyway. I want the remaining unfunded 95% repealed. Freeze, repeal.

Three: Czars, I want the circumvention of our checks and balances stopped immediately. Fire the czars. No more czars. Government officials answer to the process, not to the president. Stop trampling on our Constitution and honor it.

Four, cap and trade. The debate on global warming is not over. There is more to say.

Five, universal healthcare. I will not be rushed into another expensive decision. Don’t you dare try to pass this in the middle of the night and then go on break. Slow down!

Six, growing government control. I want states rights and sovereignty fully restored. I want less government in my life, not more. Shrink it down. Mind your own business. You have enough to take care of with your real obligations. Why don’t you start there.

Seven, ACORN. I do not want ACORN and its affiliates in charge of our 2010 census. I want them investigated. I also do not want mandatory escrow fees contributed to them every time on every real estate deal that closes. Stop the funding to ACORN and its affiliates pending impartial audits and investigations. I do not trust them with taking the census over with our taxpayer money. I don’t trust them with our taxpayer money. Face up to the allegations against them and get it resolved before taxpayers get any more involved with them. If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, hello. Stop protecting your political buddies. You work for us, the people. Investigate.

Eight, redistribution of wealth. No, no, no. I work for my money. It is mine. I have always worked for people with more money than I have because they gave me jobs. That is the only redistribution of wealth that I will support. I never got a job from a poor person. Why do you want me to hate my employers? Why ‑‑ what do you have against shareholders making a profit?

Nine, charitable contributions. Although I never got a job from a poor person, I have helped many in need. Charity belongs in our local communities, where we know our needs best and can use our local talent and our local resources. Butt out, please. We want to do it ourselves.

Ten, corporate bailouts. Knock it off. Sink or swim like the rest of us. If there are hard times ahead, we’ll be better off just getting into it and letting the strong survive. Quick and painful. Have you ever ripped off a Band‑Aid? We will pull together. Great things happen in America under great hardship. Give us the chance to innovate. We cannot disappoint you more than you have disappointed us.

Eleven, transparency and accountability. How about it? No, really, how about it? Let’s have it. Let’s say we give the buzzwords a rest and have some straight honest talk. Please try ‑‑ please stop manipulating and trying to appease me with clever wording. I am not the idiot you obviously take me for. Stop sneaking around and meeting in back rooms making deals with your friends. It will only be a prelude to your criminal investigation. Stop hiding things from me.

Twelve, unprecedented quick spending. Stop it now.

Take a breath. Listen to the people. Let’s just slow down and get some input from some nonpoliticians on the subject. Stop making everything an emergency. Stop speed reading our bills into law. I am not an activist. I am not a community organizer. Nor am I a terrorist, a militant or a violent person. I am a parent and a grandparent. I work. I’m busy. I’m busy. I am busy, and I am tired. I thought we elected competent people to take care of the business of government so that we could work, raise our families, pay our bills, have a little recreation, complain about taxes, endure our hardships, pursue our personal goals, cut our lawn, wash our cars on the weekends and be responsible contributing members of society and teach our children to be the same all while living in the home of the free and land of the brave.

I entrusted you with upholding the Constitution. I believed in the checks and balances to keep from getting far off course. What happened? You are very far off course. Do you really think I find humor in the hiring of a speed reader to unintelligently ramble all through a bill that you signed into law without knowing what it contained? I do not. It is a mockery of the responsibility I have entrusted to you. It is a slap in the face. I am not laughing at your arrogance. Why is it that I feel as if you would not trust me to make a single decision about my own life and how I would live it but you should expect that I should trust you with the debt that you have laid on all of us and our children. We did not want the TARP bill. We said no. We would repeal it if we could. I am sure that we still cannot. There is such urgency and recklessness in all of the recent spending.

From my perspective, it seems that all of you have gone insane. I also know that I am far from alone in these feelings. Do you honestly feel that your current pursuits have merit to patriotic Americans? We want it to stop. We want to put the brakes on everything that is being rushed by us and forced upon us. We want our voice back. You have forced us to put our lives on hold to straighten out the mess that you are making. We will have to give up our vacations, our time spent with our children, any relaxation time we may have had and money we cannot afford to spend on you to bring our concerns to Washington. Our president often knows all the right buzzword is unsustainable. Well, no kidding. How many tens of thousands of dollars did the focus group cost to come up with that word? We don’t want your overpriced words. Stop treating us like we’re morons.

We want all of you to stop focusing on your reelection and do the job we want done, not the job you want done or the job your party wants done. You work for us and at this rate I guarantee you not for long because we are coming. We will be heard and we will be represented. You think we’re so busy with our lives that we will never come for you? We are the formerly silent majority, all of us who quietly work , pay taxes, obey the law, vote, save money, keep our noses to the grindstone and we are now looking up at you. You have awakened us, the patriotic spirit so strong and so powerful that it had been sleeping too long. You have pushed us too far. Our numbers are great. They may surprise you. For every one of us who will be there, there will be hundreds more that could not come. Unlike you, we have their trust. We will represent them honestly, rest assured. They will be at the polls on voting day to usher you out of office. We have cancelled vacations. We will use our last few dollars saved. We will find the representation among us and a grassroots campaign will flourish. We didn’t ask for this fight. But the gloves are coming off. We do not come in violence, but we are angry. You will represent us or you will be replaced with someone who will. There are candidates among us when he will rise like a Phoenix from the ashes that you have made of our constitution.

Democrat, Republican, independent, libertarian. Understand this. We don’t care. Political parties are meaningless to us. Patriotic Americans are willing to do right by us and our Constitution and that is all that matters to us now. We are going to fire all of you who abuse power and seek more. It is not your power. It is ours and we want it back. We entrusted you with it and you abused it. You are dishonorable. You are dishonest. As Americans we are ashamed of you. You have brought shame to us. If you are not representing the wants and needs of your constituency loudly and consistently, in spite of the objections of your party, you will be fired. Did you hear? We no longer care about your political parties. You need to be loyal to us, not to them. Because we will get you fired and they will not save you. If you do or can represent me, my issues, my views, please stand up. Make your identity known. You need to make some noise about it. Speak up. I need to know who you are. If you do not speak up, you will be herded out with the rest of the sheep and we will replace the whole damn congress if need be one by one. We are coming. Are we coming for you? Who do you represent? What do you represent? Listen. Because we are coming. We the people are coming.

Ask Maryland How Soak the Rich Policies Have Worked

sanity — 2009-05-26T15:51:28+00:00

Here’s a two-minute drill in soak-the-rich economics:

Maryland couldn’t balance its budget last year, so the state tried to close the shortfall by fleecing the wealthy. Politicians in Annapolis created a millionaire tax bracket, raising the top marginal income-tax rate to 6.25%. And because cities such as Baltimore and Bethesda also impose income taxes, the state-local tax rate can go as high as 9.45%. Governor Martin O’Malley, a dedicated class warrior, declared that these richest 0.3% of filers were “willing and able to pay their fair share.” The Baltimore Sun predicted the rich would “grin and bear it.”

One year later, nobody’s grinning. One-third of the millionaires have disappeared from Maryland tax rolls. In 2008 roughly 3,000 million-dollar income tax returns were filed by the end of April. This year there were 2,000, which the state comptroller’s office concedes is a “substantial decline.” On those missing returns, the government collects 6.25% of nothing. Instead of the state coffers gaining the extra $106 million the politicians predicted, millionaires paid $100 million less in taxes than they did last year—even at higher rates.

No doubt the majority of that loss in millionaire filings results from the recession. However, this is one reason that depending on the rich to finance government is so ill-advised: Progressive tax rates create mountains of cash during good times that vanish during recessions. For evidence, consult California, New York and New Jersey.

Link

The rich aren’t stupid. They are not going to ‘grin and bear it’. How stupid do you have to be to believe that?

They can easily move to another state where the taxes are less.

So in the end, raising and raising taxes on the rich, not only does it NOT pay off, they are in worse shape than before.

Take a hint Washington.

All of this means that the burden of paying for bloated government in Annapolis will fall on the middle class. Thanks to the futility of soaking the rich, these working families will now pay Mr. O’Malley’s “fair share.”

So, when tax the rich policies don’t work out - who foots the bill - welcome the Middle Class.

The Teleprompter

sanity — 2009-05-19T05:34:18+00:00

I get emails from time to time of various jokes and funnies, but damn….this was so funny I had to share.

Enjoy.

Prank Causes Business Crisis and Felony Charges

sanity — 2009-04-16T14:54:44+00:00

When two Domino’s Pizza employees filmed a prank in the restaurant’s kitchen, they decided to post it online. In a few days, thanks to the power of social media, they ended up with felony charges, more than a million disgusted viewers, and a major company facing a public relations crisis.

The video was removed from Youtube after the manager complained of copyright violations.

This is happening more often than people expect.
Last year there was also an incident at Burger King where it showed employee bathing in the sink.

Camera phones and smaller digital recorders allow for such things to happen easily. Only thing I can think of to curb such things is immediate firing of individuals who do these things, including assistant managers who allow it to go on if they are duty at that time.

They should also be placing cameras in the food preperation areas so and let the employees know the cameras are there. I believe that would help curb problem like this.

In videos posted on YouTube and elsewhere this week, a Domino’s employee in Conover, N.C., prepared sandwiches for delivery while putting cheese up his nose, nasal mucus on the sandwiches, and violating other health-code standards while a fellow employee provided narration.

The two were charged with delivering prohibited foods.

By Wednesday afternoon, the video had been viewed more than a million times on YouTube. References to it were in five of the 12 results on the first page of Google search for “Dominos,” and discussions about Domino’s had spread throughout Twitter.

It is bad enough for businesses in the country right now with an economic downturn like this, and these two imbeciles not only actively seek to create problems for the company (I am sure that never crossed one of thier braincells though), but do so in such a fashion that will go viral within minutes of posting. Something the company did not expect nor have experience in dealing with.

As Domino’s is realizing, social media has the reach and speed to turn tiny incidents into marketing crises. In November, Motrin posted an ad suggesting that carrying babies in slings was a painful new fad. Unhappy mothers posted Twitter complaints about it, and bloggers followed; within days, Motrin had removed the ad and apologized.

I believe the companies need keep updating themselves with the various technologies that are out there, not only as a way of marketing but also as a faster way in dealing with crisis like this. Youtube, Twitter, are just some of the technologies that are in wide use, and can be used quickly to inform the public.

According to Domino’s, the employees told executives that they had never actually delivered the tainted food. Still, Domino’s fired the two employees on Tuesday, and they were in the custody of the Conover police department on Wednesday evening, facing felony charges.

But the crisis was not over for Domino’s.

“We got blindsided by two idiots with a video camera and an awful idea,” said a Domino’s spokesman, Tim McIntyre, who added that the company was preparing a civil lawsuit. “Even people who’ve been with us as loyal customers for 10, 15, 20 years, people are second-guessing their relationship with Domino’s, and that’s not fair.”

In just a few days, Domino’s reputation was damaged. The perception of its quality among consumers went from positive to negative since Monday, according to the research firm YouGov, which holds online surveys of about 1,000 consumers every day regarding hundreds of brands.

Hopefully the company will learn from this problem and develop strategies to keep it from happening again, but also learn that these technologies can be useful for them also.

“In about five minutes it’ll be sent out on delivery where somebody will be eating these, yes, eating them, and little did they know that cheese was in his nose and that there was some lethal gas that ended up on their salami,” Kristy said. “Now that’s how we roll at Domino’s.”

On Monday, commenters at the site Consumerist.com used clues in the video to find the franchise location in Conover, and told Mr. McIntyre about the videos. On Tuesday, the Domino’s franchise owner fired the employees, identified by Domino’s as Kristy Hammonds, 31 and Michael Setzer, 32. The franchisee brought in the local health department, which advised him to discard all open containers of food, which cost hundreds of dollars, Mr. McIntyre said.

Ms. Hammonds apologized to the company in an e-mail message Tuesday morning. “It was fake and I wish that everyone knew that!!!!” she wrote. “I AM SOO SORRY!”

By Wednesday evening, the video had been removed from YouTube because of a copyright claim from Ms. Hammonds. Neither Ms. Hammonds nor Mr. Setzer were available for comment on Wednesday evening, said Conover’s chief of police, Gary W. Lafone.

....

By Wednesday afternoon, Domino’s had created a Twitter account, @dpzinfo, to address the comments, and it had presented its chief executive in a video on YouTube by evening.

Link
There will always be those employees who when bored will resort to this type of behaviour. companies need to show this is not to be tolerated and fire those involved, including management if it is allowed under their watchful eyes.

There is always someone willing to take your spot when your fired - people seem to forget that.

As for the two imbeciles, I am curious as to what they think about thier little prank now.
Now that they are facing felony charges and being fired.

Hump Day Funny

sanity — 2009-02-18T17:01:23+00:00

You are halfway through the work week. Congratulations!!

To help inspire you to get through the rest of the week, is a bit of laughter:

What’s the difference between a thief and a politician?

A thief steals then runs…..

A politician runs then steals!

Post more laughter to get others through the week.

Judge Arrested - Becomes Vulgar, Disrespectful and a Bigot

sanity — 2009-01-27T16:04:18+00:00

Repeatedly using vulgar and racial insults, Superior Court Judge E. Curtissa Cofield argued with a police officer — addressing him as “Negro trooper” at one point — who was trying to process her on a charge of drunken driving in Glastonbury last October, a police video released Monday shows.

Cofield also is heard twice on the video using the racial term “n——-.”

The state’s Judicial Review Council released the video Monday after it found cause to pursue five judicial misconduct charges against her, several of them based on what was termed disparaging, demeaning or “racially inappropriate” language.

The council has scheduled a hearing Feb. 9 to determine whether Cofield violated the judicial code of conduct and, if so, what action to take against her.

Full article and video can be seen at the bottom Link.

What will be Obama’s first 100 Minutes as President?

sanity — 2009-01-19T09:01:00+00:00

Mad Magazine has a different question:
What will Barack Obama achieve during his first 100 minutes in office?

Minutes 1-2: Round up Michelle and kids, give finger to Bush and Cheney, head to Oval Office

Minute 3: Remove stupid flag pin from lapel

Minutes 10-13: Sneak out to Rose Garden for a quick smoke

Minute 25: Go on Facebook; put out a friend request to Ahmadinejad (with no preconditions)

Minute 26: Remind Biden to “shut his f*#king cakehole”

Minutes 45-48: Sneak out to Rose Garden for a quick smoke

Minutes 65-67: Delete “private” Scarlett Johansson photos before surrendering Blackberry to Secret Service

Minutes 91-99: Do a little blow

Posting Here and Actual Cover Here.

RACISM even in COMIC BOOKS (satire)

sanity — 2009-01-09T03:59:00+00:00

On Jan. 14, Marvel Comics is releasing a special issue of Amazing Spider-Man #583 with Obama depicted on the cover. Inside are five pages of the two teaming up and even a fist-bump between Spidey and the new president.

Fist bump?
Whaat?!?
Obama shakes his head in confusion and says, ‘Your not my wife!’

Spider-Man stops the Chameleon from spoiling Obama’s swearing-in. At one point, Spider-Man says he mistook Vice President-elect Joe Biden for the Vulture

Link

Peter Parker (Spiderman)- White Man
Barack Obama (Newly elected President) - Black Man

Here we go again, the white man has to save the Black man.

How racist is THAT!?!?!

(for those who may have missed it - this is satire)

Democrats Bungle Handling of Burris

sanity — 2009-01-08T04:39:00+00:00

Senate Democrats who thought they could push away Roland Burris misjudged the racial fallout, underestimated public reaction and wound up on shaky legal ground.

The blunders began when the Democrats, including President-elect Barack Obama, insisted they would not seat Burris as the Senate’s only black member because the appointment came from a governor accused of trying to sell Obama’ former seat.

On Wednesday, they all but admitted being outflanked by Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich, praising Burris and suggesting he soon will be a senator.

Eight days ago, Obama and Senate Democratic leaders saw Blagojevich as so politically damaged that they announced they would reject anyone he appointed to finish Obama’s term. Every Democratic senator signed a letter to the same effect.

Privately, key Democrats now admit they miscalculated from the start. They spent this week trying to backtrack and save face.

They had overstated their legal powers to block Burris’s appointment, they said, and failed to foresee the ability of Burris—a little-known Democrat with no apparent ties to Blagojevich’s misdeeds—to make himself a sympathetic figure in the national media.

Race complicated the matter, with many people asking how Democrats could prevent Burris from replacing Obama as the only black senator.

So from the start it looks like the Democrats rushed forward without thinking, overstepped thier legal authority, and made promises and statements to the media thinking they could get away with this.

Unfortunately, the longer they held out against Burris, the more they got accused of Racism.

Top Democrats’ response was quick and nearly unanimous: Burris would never be seated because of the governors’ misdeeds.

“Anyone appointed by Gov. Blagojevich cannot be an effective representative” and “will not be seated by the Democratic caucus,” said Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., and his top deputy, Sen. Dick Durbin, D-Ill.

Obama said, “Senate Democrats made it clear weeks ago that they cannot accept an appointment made by a governor who is accused of selling this very Senate seat.”

Obama, Reid and Durbin are lawyers and among the nation’s highest-achieving politicians. Now, however, their initial comments seem unusually tone-deaf.

I understand they were trying to distance themselves and were concerned about the upcoming re-election possibilities of the seat, but how they went about this was unprofessional and yes, Un-democratic.

It shown a very bad light on the Democrats on how they reacted to this, public reaction was favorable for Burris and cries of Racism were starting to come from within thier own party as support among Democrats from this standoff was crumbling.

Meanwhile, the legal basis for opposing Burris came under greater scrutiny. Sen. Dianne Feinstein, D-Calif., had signed the letter opposing Burris’s appointment, but on Tuesday, the day Burris got turned away from the Capitol into a cold rain, she had a new view.

“Does the governor have the power, under law, to make the appointment?” she asked rhetorically. Yes, she answered, no matter how many accusations are lodged against him.

Sen. Patrick Leahy, a Vermont Democrat who chairs the Senate Judiciary Committee, phoned Reid last week to express concerns about the legal basis for barring Burris, and warned that the Democratic solidarity was crumbling.

On Monday, Obama and Reid spoke. Obama “conveyed the sense that if Burris has the legal standing to be seated, he should be, sooner rather than later,” said a transition official who could speak only on background because the conversation was private.

So, again it wasn’t until there was a solid front barring Burris, and going to the media about it, before someone decided to actually sit down and ask - was what they were doing even LEGAL?!

Obama seeing this as a legal appointment most likely did not want to see this drag out and get worse - get him seated “sooner rather than later” which I take as… NOW!!

The Congressional Black Caucus was preparing to vote unanimously to support seating Burris.

Support for barring Burris crumbling, legal footing for barring him shaky at best, calls of racism coming from within thier own party - and the Black Caucus preparing to vote UNANIMOUSLY to support Burris.

There was nothing else they could do but cave, and try and save face.

On Wednesday, everything seemed changed. Reid warmly received Burris in his Capitol office, then told reporters he was waiting for the Illinois Supreme Court to decide whether the Illinois secretary of state had to sign off on Blagojevich’s appointment.

“I think it’s a pretty easy hurdle to get over,” Reid said of the remaining impediments to seating Burris.

A reporter asked whether Blagojevich had outmaneuvered him.

No, Reid said, recounting the governor’s arrest, vulgar language and wiretapped descriptions of the empty Senate seat as a gold mine to be sold.

“How are we supposed to react?” Reid asked, a bit plaintively. “We’ve acted in a very reasonable way.”

Link

Reid warmly greeted the Burris, whom he said he would never seat, would not recognize, made to go through security like a visitor, and had the Sargeant at Arms turn away.

No hard feelings - ok?

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., Do you think that barring Burris from taking his seat without solid knowledge if what you were doing was even legal, was the right thing to do?

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev, “We’ve acted in a very reasonable way.”

If you say so Senator, if you say so....