Time Magazine Picks ME As Person Of The Year
Wow. I’m honored. This is SO unexpected. I don’t even have an acceptance speech prepared. They didn’t even call me. They haven’t told me where I can go to get this award, either. What should I wear? Also, just what is it? Is it like a trophy that I can put on a shelf in some completely obvious place so I can brag about it to anybody who will listen? Or is it money like they give out to whichever bumbling fool that wins the Nobel Peace Prize each year? I hope it’s money. Big greasy piles of cash. Sigh. I like money.
Of course, if you read Time magazine (or at least look at the cover which is all I’m likely to do with this completely bogus issue) you’ll think they meant YOU are the person of the year. Don’t kid yourself for one second, pal. I’m pretty darn sure they meant me.
I’m curious, though....what kind of morons are they employing at Time these days? It sure took some brain power to come up with this one. There are thousands out there who could have been picked. There’s uh, well, uh...how about the new leader of the U.N.? You know, what’s-his-face from Korea? And then there’s, uh...well, you get the picture.
This has the look of one of those decisions that are made in some meeting room by a higher placed executive and the rest of the meeting gives him a “Harumph” of concurrence and tell him how brilliant he is, how clever and innovative. They could have picked someone of consequence from the six-billion people on this planet, but, no, they picked me. I guess I’ll just have to live with that.
Harumph. Morons.
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