-Charles Bukowski
Hi. My name is Robbie Port. I'm 23 years old. I've been divorced once and I have a little girl. I have a good job, though I'm not rich and paying the bills is a worry that is never far from my mind. My relationship with my ex-wife is not very good and it often seems as though she does whatever she can to make my life difficult. I don't know if this is on purpose or not, but I do know that for whatever reason she does not like me.
I live in an ordinary little house in an ordinary little neighborhood. I'm just your ordinary, average guy.
I often look at my life and wonder where it is I'm heading, what it is that I'm trying to achieve. Am I supposed to be amassing as much money as I can? Am I supposed to devote my life to some religious or political pursuit in a vain effort to make the world a better place? I don't know. Its obvious that some people spend their lives in pursuits like those, but something in me has never quite felt that way.
So what makes a life worth living?
Maybe its taking a friend to a place they've never been before.
Maybe its getting up early on a Saturday morning to go fishing and watching the sun come up over the lake.
Maybe its cruising down a highway on a hot summer day blasting Led Zeppelin on the stereo or sitting in a dark room and listening to old Beatles songs.
It could be sitting down to find a good movie and TV and seeing that the Godfather starts in five minutes on HBO.
It could be sitting with your grandmother and finding a common passion for Johnny Cash or helping a stressed out mom in the grocery store carry some boxes out to her car.
Maybe its dancing in the living room with your daughter to the musical stylings of the Steve Miller Band.
I'm pretty sure that sitting close to a girl that you love and feeling that there is no possible to tell her exactly how much you love her has something to with it.
Perhaps it has something to do with the way an old baseball glove has the indefinable smell of summer in it or the way the crack of a well-hit ball is pleasing to the ears.
It could very well be a wild night out with your friends.
There are probably a hundred or so moments like these for me in a month. Some days have lots, some days don't have any. Maybe, if I'm lucky, I'll be able to string enough of the "lots" days together to reach a time when the "don't" days are few and far between so that when I look back I will be able to see that mine was a life worth living.
Life is hard, there's no two ways about it, and to make matters even worse I screw up all the time. Sometimes I spend too much money and other times I say mean things to the ones that I love the most. If it wasn't for the kindness and understanding of my loved ones I don't know where I'd be.
I started writing this post with the intent of passing on some kind of life philosophy that could possibly be taken to heart and make somebody's life better but looking back at what I've written I'm not even sure what I could say. There really is no philosophy to life. There's no sure fire, seven-step method that's going to get you to where you want to be, if you even know where you want to be.
So I guess all I can say is that you have to enjoy the simple things in life. Bask in the attention you get from the ones you love, but don't forget to show them your love too. The next time you hear somebody being put down, don't join in. Offer some kind words to the next person you see who is having a bad day. Hold the door open for the person behind you when you're walking into a building. Try to make people feel better about themselves.
Forgive people.
Don't hold grudges.
Cry at movies.
Never, ever be afraid to laugh out loud.
And smile at people. Its just a small thing, but it will make you both feel better.