Election 2008: Arkansas Bans Adoption Of Children By Gays And Unmarried Couples

Proof • November 8, 2008

Somewhat overlooked in all the hoopla concerning gay marriage in various states – specifically Arizona, California, and Florida – is the fact that Arkansas passed something called Act 1, which specifically denies adoption rights to gays and “unmarried couples.”
I have some problems with this.
I’ve been involved in many child cases and have personally seen kids abused, neglected, and hurled, unwanted, into the tender loving arms of the state, where they stay, bounced from foster home to foster home until someone takes them in permanently – if they’re lucky.
If they’re not lucky they stay in some state home until they’re old enough to leave. Arkansas, it its wisdom, has decided that anyone who isn’t married – and of course that means gay couples – can’t adopt one of those kids. Here’s a quote from a group called the Family Council on this issue:

Today, after almost 2 years of working on this issue, I can honestly say that we’ve all won. Because of your dedication, children will be placed in better homes. Because of your determination, a gay agenda that our opponents brought to Arkansas has been put on its heels. This is a good day for Arkansas, and you have a right to feel proud to be a part of something so significant.

So…..let me get this straight. Those kids are somehow better off in the custody of the state than they would be in the home of an loving unmarried or loving gay couple?
And before anyone starts on this issue, no, being gay does not automatically make someone a pedophile, nor does it automatically put the child into some kind of sleazy environment. There is no way anyone will ever be able to convince me that a child being raised with loving adopted parents, either unmarried heterosexuals or unmarried gays, would be any worse off that they would be being booted from family to family, home to home, or staying for their entire childhood in one of the state’s wonderful “homes” for unwanted kids.
This sort of short sighted idiocy is what gives conservatives a bad name.
Look, I’m a knuckle dragging, near Neanderthal, tool loving, almost cliche straight man and if I can see that this sort of thing is just plain butt-stupid wrong, then for the life of me I can’t understand why some people think it’s just all right to deny unwanted kids a chance to be loved and taken care of regardless of the marriage status or sexual orientation of the people who decide to care for them.
I understand that marriage is what it is – a union between man and woman. But that doesn’t mean a couple – any couple – who won’t or can’t marry and who can prove they’re responsible and caring adults shouldn’t be able to rescue some kid from the psychological hell of being unwanted.
Like I said, this won’t set well with some of my fellow conservatives, but I have a message for the sort of people who would condemn those kids to a type of despair that they themselves cannot even imagine: Grow up you fools.
I’m sure those kids who are right now bouncing from foster care to foster care will thank you for your victory.

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http://Array Pilgrim

Bob,

This isn’t Rob, it’s Pilgrim. And if my opinion doesn’t set well with you on this….tough. Get over it.
MMA Grappler

Kenny:

I often agree with what you write, but here is an instance where I disagree with you.

As I said earlier, many gays and lesbians take in hard to adopt children.

There’s a lot of straight women out there who have women outside wedlock, and only keep those kids for a few years. Then a lot of these kids get shuffled between foster homes, and develop serious behavioral disorders. At that point many are so dysfunctional that few straight couples want to take them into their home.

Should these kids be forced to live in foster care until they are 18 when there are so many responsible gays and lesbians who are willing to make a place for such children?

You may think that every child should be raised by a married mother and father, and I agree. If I were dying and leaving behind a child to be taken care of, I’d probably prefer that the child have an adoptive mother and father.

But we live in a world where too many kids never experience any sort of permanant home. And for many, their best shot at some kind of stable home is one headed by a gay person.

P.S. Go look at what kids going to low income schools, where a lot of foster kids go, look like. Often dirty and wearing crappy clothes. You can bet your ass that no adoptive gay father would send his kids to school looking like they just slept under a prodge.
Hoss

I’m all for gay folks adopting, but I’m also okay with them getting married. I don’t care what kind of happy, nurturing, healthy home a child gets to grow up in… straight or gay.
Brian

I am first going to acknowledge that i am not an expert on adoption or the stats of children in the system. am an expert on morality and conservative.

I am actually in favor of denying adoption rights to homosexuals. This goes to the root of what a family is, the the biblical sense (What Gosd designed). Being a religious person indicates that a family consists of a woman (Mother) and a man (Father). Since a homosexual couple doesn’t qualify under this definition, I do not think they qualify as a family.

Flame away!
Joseph

You nailed it Pilgrim.
MMA Grappler

This is a such a stupid policy. Gay addoptive parents are often the last resort for special needs children.

Over the last decade, Gays and Lesbians have opened their homes to thousands of physically and mentally handicapped children. The same can be said for older and biracial children, who are usually harder to place.

I have never known of a single case where a gay man has ever behaved in an innapropriate manner with their children.

The fact is that the single biggest group of molesters is men living “in sin” with unmarried women, especially if they are unrelated to the children.

The idea that gay parents want to molest their children is nothing less than a blood libel against gays.
Hoth

I agree with Pilgrim. While I firmly believe that a child is better off being raised by heterosexual families than by homosexual families, I believe with equal firmness that a child is better off being raised by a homosexual family than being raised by the state.
Pilgrim

There are a lot of screwed up kids out there because of maladjusted parents.

Any adoption process is a long procedure and potential parents are thoroughly investigated. Biological parents aren’t. Nobody checks to see if they’re stable enough to have a kid.

And couple who wants to adopt could and probably would come under a microscope.

There’s the difference.
Neiman

No offense Nieman

I hadn’t offered ny comments on this thread, so why single me out for your comments? Quite strange!

There is no way anyone will ever be able to convince me that

Evidence of a closed, bigoted mindset! No one having closed their mind can ever again be thought to be a thinking, rational person.

I can’t understand why some people think it’s just all right to deny unwanted kids a chance to be loved and taken care of regardless of the marriage status or sexual orientation of the people who decide to care for them.

A child molestor would claim they really love children. Plus, there are three basic kinds of love: Phileo – Friendship, sincere affection for another person. This love can be terribly selfish or even within selfish limits, appear to be selfless. Eros – lust, not just sexual desire but lust after someone or something. This is always totally selfish love. Agape – The is the God kind of Love, wholly selfless and giving, offering unconditional acceptance. The point being, just because a person is in a home filled with love it does not mean it is good for them or anyone else, even the person feeling that perverse form of love. Homosexuality is a combination of Eros and Phileo love, it offers kindness and affection and often sexual desire, but it is wholly selfish, always demanding something in return.

The truth is, IMO, that these children being raised in homosexual families are directly and/or indirectly being taught to reject Christ and Judeo-Christian Moral-spiritual values; and no matter how well off you think they are, if it leads them eventually into Perdition’s flames for all eternity, these precious little souls you pretend to love will suffer terrible torment for your right to be stylish and politically correct and to embrace your debauchery. Of course, you will all raise your voices in protest because you have rejected Christ as being a myth, but if you are wrong, it is these children that will pay the ultimate and horrifying price for your self indulgence and vanity.

I could offer many comments to debate this matter, but why bother? Your side has already, for a season, won the battle to defeat Jesus and His Church. The Arkansas law will be overturned, not because it isn’t right, moral and just, but because the forces of anti-Christ are in power everywhere today in America. Even in California, the amendment banning homosexual marriage will be overturned by the State Supreme Court and because homosexual activists have been very careful to avoid any federal issues, there can be no appeal to the SCOTUS.

Your side has won the war against Christ for a season of time, why not just be happy and forget this matter? What do you care what I or any Christian might say on this or any subject at all? It is a waste of time, this is an secular-atheist state at war with God and the forces of Judeo-Christian moral-spiritual values; and until Christ returns, you can all enjoy any perverse thing your hearts desire, why worry, be happy!

You have won! For today!
Neiman

I just don’t know what’s best.

A double minded person is unstable in all their ways!

Your feelings are neither here nor there, which means, with no disrespect to you intended, that you apparently have no strong core moral values to guide your beliefs and life. It is better to deal with an evil person, because we know how to fight evil, but to fight someone that is lukewarm, mushy, without some secure moral values is very difficult; and that is why we are where we are at morally today in America. People many decades ago and since then knew certain things were wrong, but not wanting to seem extreme or unkind and feeling compassion for others, they took a middle position on key moral issues of allowing certain behavior for other people while rejecting it in their own lives. This wasn’t kind it all because it encouraged the moral-spiritual degeneration of America and now we are reaping the vile fruits, the unspeakable evil America has become, all because too many people refused to take strong moral positions.

No disrespect intended, it is just my opinion!
Neiman

di butler: I was only reacting to your comments and feelings under this thread, not to you as a whole person!
di butler

Neiman,

I guess I was a little shocked by your assessment of my post. I have been accused here and everywhere of being too single-minded. I actually have very strong core beliefs. I am an avid pro-life supporter, for one. I appreciate that you weren’t trying to attack me, but I was just being honest that I feel very torn on this issue. I don’t think that makes me weak-minded or squishy. Maybe you should read some of my other posts. I have gotten attacked many times for being a “Jesus Freak.” I’m not even sure what qualifies one to be a “JF.”
dragon poker

This kind of silly jesus doctrine stuff has no place in a modern society. If a person feels(thats what it is, “Feeling”, not intellectual conclusion) that a gay is not quailified to raise a child that otherwise would be in a foster home, then all these same people should go out and adopt one of these unfortunate children, or better yet, just shut the fuck up and join the 21st century.

No offense Nieman
Wing Chun Geologist

Try to think of all the benefits of being raised by a gay paret:

Gourmet breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Back to School shopping

If you’re fat or unkempt, it’s makeover time.

Actually I know a gay teacher who’s raising three children abandoned ny a relative. He’s a very serious surrogate father, and tries to instill a lot of conservative values in the kids.

I do happen to know a hole bunch of conservative gay man, one of whom is staunchly anti-communist and rabidly prolife. He’s addopted two young men and requires them to go to mass every week.
http://americanpumainitaly.blogspot.com/ sarainitaly

I can promise you that any child would prefer to be raised by a parent that loves them, cares for them and provides a safe home. They don’t care if they are gay, straight, or purple. A child wants a loving home.

Anyone denying a child a home is forcing their bigotry on a child, and the child is the one to suffer.

I was baffled to read that 70% african american obama supporters voted against prop 8 in California….

http://americanpumainitaly.blogspot.com/2008/11/african-americans-have-suffered-at-hand.html
http://www.commoncts.blogspot.com/ Steve

Great post!

Would you like a Link Exchange with our new blog COMMON CENTS where we blog about the issues of the day?

http://www.commoncts.blogspot.com
http://insanereindeer.blogspot.com/ Kenny

MMA, I get this. I don’t understand where this is a reason to give these children to single parents.

Some 35 year old guy comes to a foster home and says “I’d like a little girl please…I don’t have a wife” and this raises no alarms? That’s not compassion, that’s neglegence.

I repeat:

I can agree with letting gays adopt, single people makes me raise an eyebrow.

There is never a reason to let a single person adopt a non-related child. We don’t let (in most states) single people be foster parents, because this increases risk for the child.
http://insanereindeer.blogspot.com/ Kenny

As usual, they are placing the wishes of the adults over the best interests of the children. Does this also mean that a single person can’t adopt a child?

Actually that’s best for the child. Unless the child is family (a sibling, sibling’s child, grandchild, etc), there is little reason to adopt children to single people.

Single people are less likely to have pure motivations, or the ability to care for the child. I can agree with letting gays adopt, single people makes me raise an eyebrow.
di butler

I have to admit I am all over the board on this one. My first reaction is that any decent people should be able to adopt. I’m not sure with a single parent if it would be a good idea for a man to adopt a little girl, but then what’s to stop him if he likes little boys?? I think a good single parent is leaps and bounds above no home, I have seen this work out o.k. I am definately against gay marriage, but not a civil union. As far as kids go, I am torn. The main reason is I have known several gay couples w/ kids. Most of them, the kids are odd. I know that sounds mean, or vague, but, when I worked at elementary schools, I would always notice kids that seemed a little weird. One day I started realizing that about 80% of the kids that seemed strange had gay parents. I wasn’t trying to be mean, It just struck me as maybe sometimes that isn’t a good idea. Then, I lived by a couple of women who had a son. He was small for his age, and wimpy. Super nice kid, but when he started h.s. and the other kids found out about his 2 moms, he would get so depressed because they were vicious. They would scream names at him out of the bus windows. He told me several times he hated his life and wished he could live w/ his dad, he was tired of being the rug muncher’s kid. I felt so bad for him. Ayway, he ended up commiting suicide, so I guess in theory, it’s better to have someone to really love and provide for the kids, but at what price? I just don’t know what’s best.
http://bobmccarty.com/ Bob

You’re right, Rob. Your opinion on this issue doesn’t set well with me.
http://sayanythingblog.com/readers/entry/homosexuality_is_wrong_-_a_compendium move_zig

How odd.

After voting for the preservation of traditional marriage in several states, homosexuals vow to fight to overturn those results by court action.

But after an election, with much of the voting tainted by ACORN-type hijinks, the rest of us Americans just need to fall in line behind our president.

Does anyone else see this as kinda one-way?

Buy ammo.

Join the Resistance.
ellinas

Well said Pilgrim. A loving home beats being a ward of the state.
Pilgrim

I agree with Kenny that a single parent adoption is a bad idea on many levels.

Not only does it increase the risk of abuse – it definitely increases the risk of neglect. Unless the person is independently wealthy like some of the Hollywood types they have to work. So….where’s the kid then? There isn’t an option of a second parent to care for them.
http://www.bikebubba.blogspot.com/ Bike Bubba

Probably this misses an even bigger problem; there are a lot of people out there who won’t even consider adopting kids in the foster system because of the byzantine rules of social services.

Personally, I would at least favor that there be a preference for these kids to go into homes with two married (opposite sex) parents. That noted, you’ve somehow got to get a pipeline of such families there to start telling others they can’t adopt anymore.
Ashley

I am college student at Marshall University. In my English class we were told to choose a subject that is controversial to write an essay about. Of course, I chose Gay and Lesbians Adopting children. I think that your sexuality has nothing to do with your ability to raise, love, protect, and provide for children. I am sure that if you would ask a child in a foster home if they would rather stay there or be adopted by a gay loving couple, who do yoiu think they pick? The parents might be gay, but they can provide a stable home and love for this child. I can not believe that some states are making this illegal. I think that they should go to all the children that are up for adoption and explain to them why they now could be there until they age out of the system.
Hawk

This is truly tragic. Arkansas has just condemnded scores of kids per year to live in unloving homes. If you don’t think this makes a difference in drug use, crime rate and numerous other social ills, you are a fool.

Thank God I don’t live in Arkansas.
ews48

As usual, they are placing the wishes of the adults over the best interests of the children. Does this also mean that a single person can’t adopt a child?
http://sayanythingblog.com/readers/author/sparkiearbuckle sayanything-81

MoveZig offers:

Buy ammo.

One would expect nothing less from a cocaine-addled racist of his ilk. IMHO, Bush provided many reasons to ‘buy ammo’ and we have not even seen what an Obama autocracy will look like yet.
http://sayanythingblog.com robport

I agree that gays should be allowed to adopt, but let’s remember that what’s best for the child is the most important consideration in any adoption.

So I think there should be a tiered adoption system. All other considerations (finances, criminal history, etc.) being equal, the optimal situation for a child is a two-parent home with both a father and a mother figure. Those adopting couples should go to the top of the list.

Next comes the gay couples. Because two parents are better than one.

Finally the singles, as a single man or woman raising a child is still preferable to the state doing it.

SayAnythingBlog.com

Election 2008: Arkansas Bans Adoption Of Children By Gays And Unmarried Couples

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