America’s Manliest Cities

In a study that has Metrosexuals all atwitter, a study has been made of the fifty largest metropolitan areas, according to the census bureau, to see which are the most “manly”.

Each metro area received a manliness rating between 0 and 100 based on how well it performed in each of the study’s manly categories. Factors used to determine the manliest city rankings included the number of U.S.-made cars driven in the city, number of sports bars and BBQ restaurants, number of home improvement and hardware stores…

Number one? Nashville!

Nashville is the Mecca of manliness. With its high number of NASCAR enthusiasts, popularity of hunting and fishing and concentration of BBQ restaurants, the Music City stands alone atop the mountain of manliness.

Other highllghts:

…If you’re in the Midwest and looking to enjoy a game with a cold beverage, look no farther than St. Louis, which has the highest concentration of sports bars in the country.
Grand Rapids, Mich. has more monster truck rallies, per capita, than any other U.S. city… Got chainsaws? What about hammers and power drills? The men of New Orleans do. The “Big Easy” boasts more hardware stores per capita than any other U.S. city.

Portland ranked 47th. Heh.
Full results can be seen here.
Cross Posted at Proof Positive

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  • http://proof-proofpositive.blogspot.com/ proof_positive

    Chicago did rank 46th!

  • http://www.sayanythingblog.com/ electnixon

    … and just for the record, St. Louis is on the sissy side of the state. Ask somebody from St. Louis about the rest of MO, and they will declare that we are all ignorant rubes. What kind of a manly man says such a thing? St. Louis wants to secede to Illinois because they want to be more like Chicago.

  • http://sayanythingblog.com/readers/author/Anna/ Anna

    I was surprised SF was on the list. Obviously, it’s not the actual men that make it a manly place.

  • rbb

    So the more beer and pork rinds a city’s pop. consumes in bars as they watching cars race in a circle while there are multiple places to buy hammers on your drunk driving way home make ‘em more manly?

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    Maybe there are two Americas.

  • http://northerngleaner.blogspot.com/ Gene

    I saw that Chicago didn’t do well. EEK

    It’s the hunting thing. Once access to all hunting required that you got written permission from absentee landowners it pretty much KILLED hunting.

    I know permission to hunt is a big deal but in Illinois it stopped it cold. I no longer hunt. At least in IL.

  • http://proof-proofpositive.blogspot.com/ proof_positive

    Maybe there are two Americas

    Maybe so…
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

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  • http://www.sayanythingblog.com/ electnixon

    … and finally, St. Louis didn’t even have a football team until a few years ago. OK- I’m done now, but I’m not bitter (maybe a clinger, but not a bitter one).

    OK, one more:
    I’m disappointed that the study didn’t include sales of firearms and ammunition, although recent figures would be skewed due to the shortages. BTW, Kansas City is home to the main ammunition plant for the US armed forces.

  • http://www.sayanythingblog.com/ electnixon

    Hmm, I wasn’t sure if KC would make the list or not. Despite a plethora of BBQ restaurants, the recent additional of a NASCAR track, both Ford & GM assembly plants, and a large number of home improvement stores, I think this quote from Blazing Saddles knocked us down a couple of notches:


    Taggart: I hired you people to try to get a little track laid, not to jump around like a bunch of Kansas City faggots.

  • Buzz

    Number one? Nashville!

    The number one city for the shortest distance between a mans belly and the tip of his cock!

  • http://proof-proofpositive.blogspot.com/ proof_positive

    Your homo-erotic survey got icepicked in the head by my commentary and you are trying to act like its my problem?

    Your problems are too many to go into here, sparkless!
    Had you followed the link, you would have discovered that what you longingly hoped was a homo-erotic survey was merely a marketing survey done by a snack food company.

    I noted it for its novelty. Any conclusion drawn by you as to my thoughts on manliness are pure projection.

    Get.
    A.
    Life.

    (Or an ice pick in the head. Either would undoubtedly improve the quality of your comments!)

  • http://proof-proofpositive.blogspot.com/ proof_positive

    I was surprised SF was on the list. Obviously, it’s not the actual men that make it a manly place.

    It wasn’t the “top Manliest Men cities in the US”, it was a rating of the top 50 US cities by population. SF made the list by size and the 48th spot by nature.

  • http://sayanythingblog.com/entry/america_is_back/#c397018 DINO

    I think they equated “white trashiness” with manilness.

    Plenty of manly men here in Portland for me. :) Even the straight guys will occasionally take a walk on the wild side.

  • http://proof-proofpositive.blogspot.com/ proof_positive

    So the more beer and pork rinds a city’s pop. consumes in bars as they watching cars race in a circle while there are multiple places to buy hammers on your drunk driving way home make ‘em more manly?

    According to this “study”. I wouldn’t let your head ‘splode just yet, boob. Consider who commissioned the study!
    You live near #30, right?

  • http://proof-proofpositive.blogspot.com/ proof_positive

    Read carefully. Follow the instructions:

    Get.

    A.

    Life.

    Rinse and repeat.

  • Mickey

    Great picture Rob. I bet there is a teleprompter somewhere in that room.

    hahaha

  • grommit9

    Maybe they got “manliness” mixed up with “redneckish-ness”…
    Bdw, I LOVED that “redneck swimming pool” :)

  • http://proof-proofpositive.blogspot.com/ proof_positive

    Maybe there are two Americas

    Three, if you count Sparkie’s!

  • http://proof-proofpositive.blogspot.com/ proof_positive

    I guess Proof thinks its more manly to hang out with other dudes and watch tv than chase tail on the beach.

    Geez sparkless! Everyone else (except the spam) moved on a week ago! Whatever I do is more manly than you sitting in your Mom’s basement thinking of what you should have said in a conversation a week ago!

    Get.
    A.
    Life.

  • http://SayAnythingBlog.com The_Whistler_ofnd

    Wow, Portland’s right on top of San Francisco.

    About what I expected.

  • http://sayanythingblog.com/readers/author/sparkiearbuckle sayanything-81

    also, denmark is bitchin for that too. those atheist girls aren’t worried about what god will think if you bring em home and have at em. they’re f*cking hot too. light skin, dark hair, blue eyes, freckles… damn. nothing like those gothic, atheist Scandinavian women! some of that generalizes to Canadian girls too. and the freckles… israeli girls have freckles and spots in the nicest places! being a philosopher in places like that helps too. some of those poor girls have some serious existential angst that needs to be worked through, conversationally and otherwise…

    now what were you saying about fat redneck men partaking in latent homo activities?

  • http://sayanythingblog.com/readers/author/sparkiearbuckle sayanything-81

    Proof
    Honestly, lets consider the errr… manly options here.

    1) Go to ‘Mecca’ AKA Nashville and watch Nascar in a smokey bar over a pitcher of PBR with fat dudes smokin and dippin.

    2) Go to a ‘metrosexual’ craphole (acc to the implicit valence in your manly geography) like Miami and chase tail. Beach, exotic women, scotch, steak, strip clubs everywhere you can manage to stumble, etc. The metrosexual poindexters in their ferraris weed out all the whore$ and you can swoop in on the disaffected girls who prefer men with less makeup than them.

    Tune in Amigo!

    Three [Americas], if you count Sparkie’s!

    Well – North, South, and Central come right to mind, jackass. With mine that’d make four. I’ll take east.

    Domestically, I think there might be like 1500+ americas. you might have caught onto that when they were interviewing iraqi communities in michigan following the invasion in 2003. there are many americas. (South America? duh.)

  • http://sayanythingblog.com/readers/author/sparkiearbuckle sayanything-81

    In a study that has Metrosexuals all atwitter

    proof,
    why is your man-li-ness scale based around activities that men partake in with other men? sounds like a latent homosexual scaling of the best cities to me.

    i’ll put my money on miami. full of metrosexuals and beautiful women, miami is a mecca for men with stones that don’t dress like liberache. its raining exotic women down there! all you have to do is be a man and go get some. now let’s compare it to Nashville, where all the fat dudes are watching nascar together. which one is more manly? hmmmmm.

    maybe you should qualify your study by pointing out its for men who like to partake in latent homosexual activities with one another; not normal, whiskey drinking, stone-having men who like to chase exotic tail in tropical locales. i’m just sayin’.

    also, i heard if you can make it to iceland with dark hair, dark eyes, and some american currency… its an absurd pussy-getting-dream-come-true.

    but if you want to hang out with only other dudes and drink cheap beer… i’m sure you are onto something.

  • http://sayanythingblog.com/readers/author/sparkiearbuckle sayanything-81

    I guess Proof thinks its more manly to hang out with other dudes and watch tv than chase tail on the beach.

  • http://sayanythingblog.com/readers/author/sparkiearbuckle sayanything-81

    Proof
    Your homo-erotic survey got icepicked in the head by my commentary and you are trying to act like its my problem? Heh.

    My mom’s basement has a dirt floor and I don’t live there. I live 450 miles south of there in my primary (where the books are) apt most of the time. Sometimes I spend a month or two in my satellite apt if I need to be in the big apple. Sorry to distract you from your dude time, dude.

  • http://sayanythingblog.com robport
  • http://sayanythingblog.com/readers/author/sparkiearbuckle sayanything-81

    Did you type the headline or was that some other guy?

    The fact that you are a cut-and-paster with nothing positive to add is now your excuse?

    How much did this snack company pay you for echoing their homo-erotic advertising?

  • http://www.smartvm.com/ smartvmusa

    hey, you show something good. i like this.

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