An Open Apology Letter to the Other 49 States
09/19/2005
Dear Taxpayers of Alabama thru North Carolina and Ohio thru Wyoming,
I really didn't want to tell you this in a letter, but I couldn't stand looking you in the eyes and breaking this news to you in person. And before I tell you I just wanna say that I'll understand if you never want to talk to me again and if you think I am a terrible person I'll understand that too. Well here it goes.....
For quite a few years now I have been cheating on you. I'm so ashamed of myself, seriously I am. I can understand your anger and outrage for me and I think it is only fair that you know who he was. Actually it was two guys at the same time, their names are Kent and Byron.
Each year they go to the U. S. Senate and raid your hard-earned wages with no shame. They wastefully blow your money like 2 teenagers with blank checks. What's your loss is pork-barrel projects gain.
You cannot begin to understand how embarrassed of myself I am. I can't believe how gullible I was, I bought into their deceptions. That Kent guy told me up and down everyday how he was a budget-hawk and I ate it up. I was so naive. But now I know better and I've read the writing on the wall. He's no budget-hawk at all.
I was up until 2:30 last night talking on the phone with Montana and South Dakota. They've convinced me that it's time for me to stop cheating you. In fact South Dakota said that she was in the same boat as me and decided to change her ways just last year. If she can do it, I can do it too.
So starting today (er, next November) I promise I will change my ways. I will stop Kent from strangling our economy with costly tax hikes that chew up more and more of your precious money and bog down our economy. I just hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive me for the damage I've allowed to go on for so long.
Sincerely,
North Dakota
Dear Taxpayers of Alabama thru North Carolina and Ohio thru Wyoming,
I really didn't want to tell you this in a letter, but I couldn't stand looking you in the eyes and breaking this news to you in person. And before I tell you I just wanna say that I'll understand if you never want to talk to me again and if you think I am a terrible person I'll understand that too. Well here it goes.....
For quite a few years now I have been cheating on you. I'm so ashamed of myself, seriously I am. I can understand your anger and outrage for me and I think it is only fair that you know who he was. Actually it was two guys at the same time, their names are Kent and Byron.
Each year they go to the U. S. Senate and raid your hard-earned wages with no shame. They wastefully blow your money like 2 teenagers with blank checks. What's your loss is pork-barrel projects gain.
You cannot begin to understand how embarrassed of myself I am. I can't believe how gullible I was, I bought into their deceptions. That Kent guy told me up and down everyday how he was a budget-hawk and I ate it up. I was so naive. But now I know better and I've read the writing on the wall. He's no budget-hawk at all.
I was up until 2:30 last night talking on the phone with Montana and South Dakota. They've convinced me that it's time for me to stop cheating you. In fact South Dakota said that she was in the same boat as me and decided to change her ways just last year. If she can do it, I can do it too.
So starting today (er, next November) I promise I will change my ways. I will stop Kent from strangling our economy with costly tax hikes that chew up more and more of your precious money and bog down our economy. I just hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive me for the damage I've allowed to go on for so long.
Sincerely,
North Dakota
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Sparkie Arbuckle
MikeAdamson
Wing Chun Geologist
di butler
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Joel
robert108
Hannitized
